learning spanish bit by bit

learning spanish has become the thing we say whenever asked why we are here, or, whenever any justification, whether to self or to others, is necessary. like:
"working sucks"
"yeah. working sucks anywhere. dont worry its a means to an end."
"oh?"
"yeah, we are supporting oursleves so that we can live in a foreign country and learn spanish while doing so."
"right."
so, along with the free spanish lessons provided by cedei, anna and i are also taking private lessons for a nominal fee. we go to talk to as many people as we can. but note what happens in a conversation with one of my female friends:
ff: "i couldnt stay in cuenca for a year."
me: "me either."
"but i thought i could."
"oh?"
"yeah, but its been really hard to make friends."
"really? you seem to be doing fine."
"i mean, i meet slimy guys, but nothing like the chilling with people i do at home."
"yeah. at least you can talk spanish to them."
"it is much easier if you are female."
"it seems. or if you are single."
"well..."
"or doing your thing anyway."
and so anna and i are reliant on the spanish lessons for the time being until we acclimate to the social scene of cuenca. dont get me wrong - we speak plenty of spanish and have met plenty of people. im just not fluent yet and its a frustrating process.
so, i voiced this opinion to my free spanish teacher the other day, and she, good teacher she is, decided to gather up a group of her friends and bring them into our class - free of charge - to talk to us and have us talk to them.
so, to set it off, the girl whose spanish is worse than everyone elses: "what do you think of tourists?"
me, in thought: kind of self centered, but ok.
friends of teachers: its nice to have you in the country.
girl: what do you think of racism i ncuenca?
me in thought: oh come on. be nice...
fot: we are all equal in cuenca
me in thought: ok, not so, but what can we expect...
other guy, american: do any of you speak quichua?
me in thought: cmon people, lay off.
fot: (heads shaking)
og,a: but it is the language of your ancestors. you should be proud to speak it.
me: you know, we have indigenous people in our country and we dont speak their language.
og,a: yeah, but its different, these people are blood related to their indigenous.
fot: nobody learns quichua except for the rural people. our education has been in spanish.
og,a: but arent you proud of your heritage?
fot: (no reply)
me: but spanish has been the national language here for 300 years or so, right?
fot: right.
me in thought: i wonder if this guy speaks any ancestral language. this, i guess is why people dont like americans throughout the world. either we are innundating them with our military or our morality...
other girl in class: why do cuencanos like american girls so much?
me in thought: now that puts them in an uncomfortable position.
so in the end, things calmed down and everyone became friends.

english has this massive vocabulary, but not too many verb tenses. so, we are naturally wordy and artful and good lawyers, whereas spanish, who has a million verb tenses, is naturally expressive, i guess. still, i wonder why it is culturally acceptable for a man to come to the window of a woman at 3am, drunk, with 6 of his friends, and to serenade her. people here think its romantic. i think the sense of romance here is directly related to the language. emotional expression is built in to it, while for english speaking people, rationality is. i dont know.